Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Oh, hello oncoming bus,

In an attempt to exercise the new lease of autonomy I have developed since coming to uni, I am currently sleeping on my friend's floor, eating out of cans and sharing a room with 12 mouldy mugs up in Sheffield whilst my parents, with their beds, fresh food and clean mugs are residing 4 hours away. And it's absolutely brilliant. Me and Laura have spent a spontaneous week being, well, spontaneous.

There is one thing I failed to anticipate when giving my dad the 'i'm-grown-up-enough-to-go-and-live-by-myself-in-Sheffield' speech which is the whole navigating with a car scenario. When walking around Sheffield, it is so easy. There's point A,B,C and D and life is spent walking either up or down the hills between each point. However, bring the metal thing with wheels into the scenario and suddenly the friendly crossings where all the cars stop for you are replaced by big scary roundabouts where you have to take your chances and hope not to die while lots of big mean looking cars and buses cut you up. I have to admit, this week I've been down more one-way streets and tram only zones than is actually permitted in a full lifetime of driving stupidity. And I've also been wondering, why do some people feel the need to flash their lights at you?! Yes, ok I did just drive into your lane, placing my little car directly in your path on which you are cruising down at 80mph but do you really think I'm deliberately driving like a retard? Is flashing lights at me really going to help? No. Flashers are just impatient, authoritarian types who don't appreciate the stupidity of the lesser driving individuals such as myself. I could go on for hours with all the stories of how me and Laura have been lost on the roads of Sheffield but they pretty much all begin with road + map corresponding and end with us in Hillsborough and map on the page for Rotherham.

Anyway, tomorrow is move into house day which I write here solely for the purpose for looking back in a year's time and thinking 'aw before I encountered the realities of co-habiting' and am cursing this very day.

But at the end of it all, student roughing it up in halls with raw bacon festering away in the overflowing bin as we speak, or student home for holidays with home cooked food and made bed (or just a bed at all), there is still the fundamental fact that it is 1:15pm and I am in my pajamas having not seen the light of day. On that note, I'm off for a shower.